In my imagination, that camera crew followed him until it became a travelogue about one hilarious child’s search for bacon.
TMA: Mad Men is back →
…for now, anyway. Give it a like if you care at all about my self-esteem. You don’t, do you? Fine, forget it.
Don, to Pete in the promo for next week's Mad Men: I think you should be taking this decision a little more seriously.
Katie: I hope it's a decision to enter a national dance competition.
Funniest Witch Mountain comic ever? (NSFW) →
kevinslane: I try to adhere to a no-nudity rule on my Tumblr, so I’ll only post a link, rather than reblog the actual entry. Hilarious though. immorLAWLity
DJ AM found dead; pills nearby →
If that name sounds familiar, it’s because he SURVIVED A PLANE CRASH last year with Travis Barker — as in, everyone else onboard perished in flames. So unless this guy overdosed on pain pills he was taking for his burns, he’s an asshole who threw away a rare second chance at life.
One More Personal Ted Kennedy Thought...
conormckeon: I have 2 older brothers. I am not currently nor have I ever been close with my oldest brother. There is a political, social, and ideological chasm that developed as a result of we 2 living entirely separate lives despite being under the same roof for the first 18 years of my life. I can count on one hand the conversations I’ve had with him throughout my entire life. None have lasted...
If you burned the Rock of Love house to the ground, looking at the ashes would...– Seanbaby
Seanbaby v. Reality TV Dating Shows →
Someone on Top Chef (who also, presumably, "didn't come here to make friends"): It is what it is.
Me: Throw another "It is what it is" on the reality TV quote pile.
Katie: Someday I'm going to go on one of those shows and say "It's NOT what it is. It is what it's not." And then I'm going to run around in a giant top hat, bein' all weird.
Play(giarism) With Your Food
In an effort to get our enormously popular and not at all a failure Food Network article in front of a few more eyeballs, I swallowed my dignity and forwarded it along to Jillian Madison, the cunt girl who runs Food Network Humor. On the off-chance you haven’t heard of it, it’s a site dedicated entirely to making catty remarks about Rachael Ray that your mother would just love. So...
WARNING: DO NOT read this blog post if you’ve yet to check out Inglourious Basterds, because it is fucking festooned with SPOILERS. (Note: There’s also one paragraph in particular where I discuss the endings of several classic movies you should’ve seen by now, so, beware.) In a film course I took one summer at Auburn, my instructor spent almost an entire class period...
I can't wait for this to be a book. →
fittythebone: 6od: Sorry, Ned. You know I love you. And yes, Bros are just as despicable. But holy fuck I love this so hard. fuck yeah. I live in a god damn hipster mecca. Everywhere I go I see tight jeans, tighter flannel, and Bret Michaels bandanas. I would talk shit about Chuck Taylors, but I love mine, so that isn’t going to happen. New favorite Tumblr.
(Skip to 2:10 to waste slightly less of your time.) Look, I’m glad these sweaty lowlifes appreciate quality sitcoms, but this shit has outlived its amusement level. First of all, parodying comedy is retarded. It’s like Sarah Silverman — it’s never going to be funny, no matter how many dicks you put in it. Secondly, more than half of that trailer is, without explanation, a...
Don Draper Invents The Pop-Up Ad →
conormckeon: Since Andrew B. doesn’t feel like prostituting his work to the blogosphere, I’ll do it for him. This is a must read for any Mad Men fan. GOD DAMN IT. I was planning an article nearly identical to this. Good job, Andrew. You overproductive asshole.
I'll pass on the whole Sharks vs. Cats thing
Ted DiBiase Worried About Current Status of His... →
My nine-year-old self laughed uncontrollably at this.
Sandlot was on ABC Family just now.
I could watch that movie FOR-EH-VUHR.
Second 8-hour shift in two days
chhastakenovermyfreakylife: danieleric: I didn’t blog about it yesterday cause I was so damn tired (but it didn’t stop me from reblogging the popular page…), so don’t expect much input from me tonight. Have a good day, everyone! Next quarter I hae two 14.5 hour days at the hospital, plus 2-3 12 hour shifts per week for work, plus actual classes. I can’t believe 8 hours are still a big deal to...
It takes TWO to fill me up!– One particularly insatiable KFC patron in the commercial for their new Double Down Chicken Sandwich, which, apparently, is an actual thing.
VH'What the fuck have we done?'
UPDATE TO THE UPDATE: Apparently this guy also won I Love Money 3, which hasn’t even aired yet. He even showed up at the production office of the show to try and get an advance on his $250,000 winnings AFTER HE KILLED THE GIRL.
UPDATE: Apparently that guy was the winner of the whole show, the finale of which has not aired and, now, never will. This is the funniest thing that’s happened to a VH1 reality show star since Bret Michaels got laid out at the Tony Awards.
FUCK YES →
If an Indian guy comes on Who Wants to Be a...
(via adamhrabik) Or indecent exposure.
The way I'm sitting right now at work, I have my...
And there’s no realistic way to explain to my co-worker that it wasn’t.